One Mom's Journey

Becoming a self-published writer seems easy enough in today's online world.  We write, edit, find a printer or create an ebook...but then what?  With access to the Internet, this task is openly available to anyone with the finances to self-publish, however, most authors are indeed just writers and are not prepared or don't know where to start when tackling the marketing side of self-publishing.

I want to offer up 5 simple strategies to marketing your book online.  I had to do just this recently and am currently working on building my own online strategy, so it will be fun to grow and learn together.  It is important to remember that social media is a very saturated place, so it is not as easy as you think to grow a huge following - it takes perseverance, great content, and regular posting to achieve a following.  So hint number one when diving into your online strategy - work at it - everyday.

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About a year and a half ago, I made the conscious decision to write and illustrate a children's book.  It took months, but a lot of fun, a lot of editing and some experimenting with printing.  Finally, I ended up with a finished product to wrap and give to my daughter on her third birthday.  The plan was always to have it ready for her, because she was in dire need of assistance to get rid of her darn soother attachment.  Having tried other methods, I came up with Susy the Soother Fairy - who to this day - she tells everyone about.  In our home, the Soother Fairy is as popular as Santa, Toothfairy and the Easter Bunny.  It is pretty cool.

This story is not about my book, but about how I published my book and the women that have inspired me, guided me, and helped me promote.  I wanted to write about these women, because I want to inspire and help others like they have for me.

Last June I met a woman named Jacqueline Dinsmore. An entrepreneurial woman who gave up law to follow her brilliant and successful venture.  Teaming up with her very own mother, she came up with Luvali Convertibles.  It started with a reversible toque design for children, one toque could flip inside out and become another. You will have to check out her website for more details and see the breadth of product they now offer.  Now their product line is available at retailers throughout North America and to the world online.

Jacqueline Dinsmore

Jacqueline and her mom ran into my mom and my girls at the mall.  They wanted to try out one of their cute toques on my girls to make sure the sizing was right for distribution.  I said yes - and then followed up by asking for her card so that we could chat about how she grew her business into retailers North-America wide.  Having exchanged information, I followed up with her.  She was so accommodating, answered all my business questions and then passed me on to 2 other women.  One who was published and another who self-published.  Those women were Laura Berg of My Smart Hands and Meredith Deasely a self-published Pediatric Nutritionist and author.

My daughter is 3 and a half.  The other day she says to me, "Maman, I cannot wait to be bigger so I can work" - to which I replied "you aren't aloud to grow up that fast".  I don't know what the fascination is for children to want to grow up and work, or grow up and be like Mom and Dad, but I am pretty sure it has something to do with us being their most influential role model.  They see us do all sorts of incredible things that they can't to do yet.  That being said, a lot of what our children learn is through watching and listening to us. You know what is sad?  Is that most of us fail to see that, and we continue to rush through life and miss all those moments where our kids are being kids.

My goal going forward is to try and stop the rush and teach my kids about the truly important things in life.

1. Family is the most Important Thing you will Ever Own not Toys or Cars or HousesIn todays day and age, with soaring populations and global warming, and traffic and sicknesses, you just never know from day to day what is going to happen. They need to learn to not take family for granted.
2. Having Fun is better than winningSounds so cliché and to be honest, I cannot believe I want to teach my kids this - my husband and I are super competitive people, and so our kids have inherited double the competitiveness...it is trouble, I foresee it - so I plan on teaching them that fun is way better

When my oldest daughter was 2, I started trying to figure out how to get rid of that darn soother.  Her soother attachment was getting out of control.  Parents with children and soothers totally understand this constant battle to wean the child of the soother.  It is not easy, and we sometimes lack the confidence to take it away.  I know myself, I feared losing the afternoon nap and the constant battle to stop the crocodile tears. I am sure you all felt similar.  While researching some different methods, I came across this awesome list from About.com and thought I would share it.

1. Cold turkey. Stand your ground and don't give in!  It is tough, but you can do it.
2. Phase it out. Start by only allowing it at bed times and in the car, then take away the car, then take away nap, then take away overnight.  Over time is the key to this one.
3. Say hello to the "Soother Fairy" or any other mythological creature of your choosing. The goal here is to take the pressure and anger off of the parents and transform it into a rewarding event. Soothers or pacifiers go to the mythological fairy in exchange for a treat or a present. Preparation is key for this, so best to use a book or song as a tool - and repeat it often.

The children’s book, Susy the Soother Fairy, newly released this past December and is quickly becoming the go-to tool for parents who have a child with a serious soother/pacifier attachment. The book, written and illustrated by Laura Page-Hamelin in Oakville, Ontario, features a fairy and a magic sac that helps toddlers get rid of their soother/pacifier attachments once and for all.

Susy the Soother Fairy Comes when you are Three, is targeted at three year olds directly. Three year olds are able to process the information and accept what is about to happen.. The book comes complete with Susy’s magic sac, making the experience very real and successful for young ones.

This may sound horrible, but we have all ended up in this situation at least once in our lifetime.  I call it the ditch the b**ch.  It is a tough decision, but just like all things in life, this deserves a truly weighted decision. Manage the pro's and con's of keeping that friend around or ditching them for good.

Everyone has there own reasons for wanting to ditch a friend, so here are some ways on how to do it, 1 being the most tactful and hardest way - and 10 being the easiest and least tactful.  This is kind of like a choose your own adventure, because no matter which way you do it, there is bound to be some sort of short term and negative outcome.

In January of 2013 I made a very important decision to pursue the publishing of a book that I wrote and illustrated for my daughter.  The book was a tool to help her get rid of her soother - Susy the Soother Fairy. It was a leap of faith, and I watched for all the signs pointing to yes or pointing to no.  I reached out to many different authors and a trail of very successful women who helped me make my final decision. It was a very cool process, and it seemed very natural, nothing was forced.  So I followed the signs.

Here are some of the signs that scream "YES!" self-publish your book!

1. Your draft is complete, edited and perfect
2. You have reached out for feedback from family, friends and strangers and results are positive

When my hubby asked me what I wanted to do for Valentine's day, I told him flat out - stay home - order in and make it special for the kids too.  Once they go to bed, we can have our true Valentine's day (minus wine for me...boo).  He was apprehensive at first because we always do something, but this is the first year we don't have any support - the parents are all out of town, and we have never hired a baby sitter...and I am not starting on Valentine's day.

Here is what we are doing and it might be fun for all you others who are in the same boat.

#1  - Taking the Day off Work

Yes - I am doing it.  Why?  So I can have a nice relaxing morning while the kids are at daycare - then pick them up early and make some Valentine's day crafts.  Maybe hit up

My Mom and Dad have always done such a great job to make Valentine's day special for the kids.  Every Valentine's day growing up (as far as I can remember) I had a little gift of chocolates and a hand written note wishing me happy Valentine's day from Daddy.  Being Daddy's only little girl, I sure felt special.

Mom always had homemade cupcakes decorated special for Valentine's that were so delicious.  I often helped her decorate them.  The best part is they have continued this tradition with my baby girls, and have made it special for them in turn.  I love it.  To me, family and tradition is a big part of Valentine's day, and so I am passing on a few crafts for you to do with your little ones this year.

A Variety Of Printables

Spoonful.com has generously posted a variety of printable coloring pages, activity sheets, 3D candy boxes featuring your favorite Disney characters, and of course a mailbox full of printable Valentines Day cards.

I think we are all pretty much in the same boat.  We live busy lives, and we have young children that require supervision when we are away.  Well, it is time to admit to ourselves that we need date nights.  Here are 10 signs you are in need of some serious one on one time with your partner.

10. You Dread your Daily Routine

Every day is the same old. Wake up, get dressed, gets kids dressed, feed, clean etc. Fill in the blanks with how your daily rolls out.

Wake up.  Change diapers.  Make breakfast. Clean.  Maybe take care of yourself.  Clean again.  Prepare more food. Clean up some more.  Play.  Play some more.  Hubby is home, day is over.

Being an entrepreneur means that after my kids shut down for the night, I usually hit the keyboard at a fierce pace.  Research some content, write some content, sometimes multiples in one night just to try and stay ahead of the game.  Work on my online store, my website, read some awesome Social Media Examiner, then hit the hay.

Networking is a must, and we need to do it one on one.

This routine I just described is pretty typical of a Stay at Home Mom (SAHM) with a small business.  This is why I wanted to focus on some other methods of conducting business.  Networking.  Whether it is a dog walking company, a tutoring business, an online store or a massage therapist - networking is a must, and we need to do it one on one.  Let's step away from using only social marketing and join a local networking group.  Why you ask?

Depending on how you perceive couponing or deal sites will depend on your strategy here. In my case, being a self-published and new author, I would consider using a site like this for pure reach and free advertising. If I earn sales from the deal site, that is great, but be warned, your 'take home' is not huge.

Sites like Groupon, Wagjag and Sweet Deals will typically ask for a minimum discount on your product or service up to 90% off the retail price. Then they will take up to 50% of that number as profit when it sells. For example, my books currently retail for $14.50, I would offer them for $8.50 and the deal site will take $4.25, leaving me with a 'take home' of $4.25.

Why would a company ever use a site like this if it cuts so deep into profit margins?  Strategy is the correct answer.  These are a few reasons why it may be a good tactic for your business.

Reach

Before anyone knew what a digital footprint was, we all just posted, and status updated, and pinned,

and tagged to our hearts content. Later, we finally become educated and realize that everything, and

I mean EVERYTHING, that we have posted online will remain there, eternally. And this is searchable by

employers, future partners and your very own children.

Here are some ways to clean up that digital footprint and get ready for whatever the future holds.

#1 – Facebook Profile Settings

You will want to check your privacy settings and make sure that have your Facebook account is set to

friends only. Otherwise, anyone can see your timeline.

Rewind to 2010, when my daughter was born.  First time mom, lack of sleep, a baby that constantly suckled on my breasts, lack of sleep and did I mention lack of sleep?  My husband and I did it.  We committed the ultimate sin (according to some).  We gave our baby a pacifier...and guess what.  We slept.  It was wonderful, it was glorious!  I had no regrets - until she turned two.  It was crazy.

This is where I began to refer to her soother habit as an addiction. Because it was just that.  This is also when I started noticing the shifting of the teeth, so I asked around and researched and sure enough, it was recommended to try and wean a toddler of a pacifier no later than two because of the damage it can cause to the upper mouth and teeth alignment.  But, I had another new born, and it was soooooooo easy to just plug that soother in my two year olds mouth as the solution to EVERY SINGLE PROBLEM.  I am not sure looking back if the addiction was hers or mine...because that pacifier was my savior.

Yes, I did some research on soothers, but at the end of the day, sleep outweighed the potential negatives 100 per cent.  I thought you may find it useful to see some of the research I came across along the way.It may help you come to terms with the pacifier/soother vortex you have just entered and/or support your reasons for never giving a soother in the first place.

Positives:

The oxford Dictionary word of the year for 2013 "selfie" 

I really dislike selfies.  There, I said it.   Why, you ask?  Because I feel like they are self-fulfilling, self-esteem needing, self-involved photos.  I get it, once in awhile is not a bad thing.  Sure, you want to show off how darn good you look dressed up to go to a wedding - why not?  You rarely do it.  BUT YOU!  The one who posts a new selfie, kissy face, peace sign every hour on the hour - seriously...why?  I think I may start un-friending obsessive selfie takers.

Oh and you - ya you!  You know who you are - the friend who constantly comments on the obsessive selfie taker telling them how great they look and how pretty they are - do you know what you are doing?  You are encouraging them to post over and over and over again!  You are just as bad as they are.

To brief you, I traveled from Toronto to Cancun - 3.5 hours with a husband, teenage boy and 3 and 1 year old girls. We booked a Sunquest vacation and flew on West Jet. We stayed at the Gran Bahia Principe - Coba resort in Riviera Maya. This will be a very detailed review of all aspects of the vacation.

Booking with Sunquest:

We are 5 in our family - one of whom still sleeps in a crib. Sunquest would not let us stay in one room only, because the capacity was 4 people. Therefore we were charged for two rooms at dual adult occupancy. Started my vacation off on the wrong foot. Sunquest would not make it work, even though 1 of our children was still in a crib. What did that mean? Our vacation that was originally going to cost us for 2 adults, 1 teen, 1 child and 1 baby(free) now cost us 4 adults + 1 baby(free). Crazy, we are talking a HUGE difference here!

Next - our toddlers/baby suitcase was left behind in Toronto. We were left without any children's clothing and baby necessities for 40 hours. You could only imagine the horrible situation that put us in.We were allocate $200 to spend on necessities, we have yet to see how quickly we receive our reimbursement. Also while on the resort, the Sunquest rep was extremely difficult to locate in guest services, and was rarely there during his 'so called' hours.

West Jet

I took a break from everything for 9 days - in Mexico. I took a break from emailing, cell phones, cars, Facebook, Twitter, blogging - everything. And you know what, I was so proud of myself. I was even more proud of myself while I played in the pool with my husband, teenage son, three year and one year old daughters without even thinking about looking at my smartphone.

I actually had an epiphany while looking around at all the young 20 something year old couples glued to their screens while sunbathing, and again while watching the speechless conversations of the 50 something year old couples who zoned out on their screens during a romantic dinner. PEOPLE ARE PATHETIC! They are addicted. Life is happening right in front of their eyes. Why do they have to be online while this real, tropical, haven is right in front of them?

This is a touchy subject, and probably raises a lot of controversy, but I don't care. I am calling it. People are addicted to their connected life.

Hey you - with the boyfriend - burning under the crazy hot sun - while playing angry birds or something...open your eyes and talk with your man - maybe you will realise that you don't actually love him!

Hey you - Dad - with the laptop - your kids are

We are seeing more and more women run small businesses.  Why?  I am sure there are many factors that can contribute to this, but some of the biggest factors are women are trying to find a way to balance and juggle and multi-task the whole "mom" gig.

Image courtesy of www.thegospelcoalition.org

It goes something like this:  Get pregnant.  Baby is born.  Fall in love with baby.  Realise you have to go back to work.  Realise the cost of daycare.  Realise that you would rather stay at home.  Realise that household overhead does not allow for this. Figure out a way to make money and raise kids.

Here are some brilliant things moms are doing to stay at home and make money.

1. Run a home daycare.  Depending on your area you can earn between $30-$50 per day per child, and you can take care of your own kids at the same time.
2. Walk a dog Dog walkers believe it or not earn between $15-30 dollars an hour for simply walking a dog.  Walk two to three dogs a day with baby in stroller and you are getting exercise while earning extra money.  Taking in a dog while someone is on vacation can earn you between $30 and $50 dollars a day
3. Direct Marketing  Love to host parties, or socialize and have a great network?  Direct marketing is huge right now. Consider reading more on this with the Flip Flop CEO book.  Great read and really dumbs down the industry on how you can make money while raising a family. 
4. Artsy and Computer Savvy? Consider being a graphic designer. Be a Wix.com pro, or sell photography to iStock.com or shutterstock.com and earn a few extra dollars.  You can even contract your graphic design services via logo submittal online sites and earn loads of extra cash.  You can do this during nap time, or even after kids go to bed.

My toddler had never been exposed to cable television.  We streamed everything via our Boxee Box. Recently, my husband decided he wanted cable so that he could watch sports live.  In comes traditional television for the first time in 4 years.  I had no idea what I was going to experience.

My three year old was watching something on Teletoon (or something like that) and up pops a commercial. Harmless enough; toys, branding, the usual, but this was the first time she had been exposed to this - and what happened next was shocking.  For the first time ever, she started asking for everything she saw on commercials.  Mommy, I want one of those, I want that too.  Can I get that for Christmas?  Can you buy me that?  Everything she saw, whether it was a toy or an item of clothing - she wanted it.

In come self-esteem.  Little did I know that I was doing my daughter a favour by not having traditional commercials polluting her mind.  She had never compared herself to others, she had never disliked her clothing, until now.  I will never forget watching her watch a commercial with a bunch of teenage girls, with their long straight hair, cell phones and high boots walking down the street looking so cool and "typical" television perfection.  She has short and super curly gorgeous hair - now she wanted long and straight hair like them.  Poor thing...what have I done?  What has society done?